A long, long, long time ago before my own children came into my life, I made a living out of taking care of other people's children. I was a teacher and also helped out with a family who had four small children. This family became much like my family for quite some time, and actually provided me with so many of the tools and tricks that get me through this crazy kid filled life that I'm living today. (if for some reason you ever happen to read this, 'said family' from above, I truly adore you all) Anyways, back in those days I remember flipping through magazines now and then and naturally, parenting magazines were among those lying around their home. One article I remember reading was about the different friends that every mother needs and for some reason, it kind of stuck with me. After some intense googling (not really) I came across this article that is if not the same article, then very closely resembles the one I recall from years ago. It describes the six friends that every mother needs and why, while also giving tips on how you can keep those friendships. A good read for a rainy day, but only after you've read all my posts of course! Here's my take on what 'Parenting' had to say about my friends...
1. The Mom in the Same Boat
Well done, Parenting. I couldn't agree more! No one understands 'poop up the back' or time-outs that don't work like someone who is living it too. You can laugh while talking about gas vs smile and cry about the loss of your pre-motherhood body and know that you are not alone. This friend is a lifesaver, literally. Find her, keep her, and value her because she needs you and you need her and together you'll conquer the world! Or at least a couple of kids who are in it. I have a handful of friends who are in my boat and I am SO thankful for them all. These are the friends who keep me from jumping out of the boat!
2. The No-Kids Pal
Thank God for the No-Kids Pal!! While I really appreciate those friends in my boat, I also appreciate the girls over there in the yacht with the margaritas in hand! These are the girls who are always up for a night out on the town, a quiet dinner we'll make at home, and are always, always there to remind me that I'm not 'just a Mom'. When I'm with these friends I laugh until my face hurts and forget about diapers and doctors appointments for just a little while. Although they love my children and adore their cuteness as much as the rest of us, they loved me before my kids and they love me without them and that's something we can all use in a friend!
3. The Been-There, Done-That Mom
Whether we like it or not, we all know one of these friends. But most of the time, we like it. This is having someone in your corner who can give advice and tell you what works, doesn't work, where to go, what to buy, and so on. Sometimes we need help. We ask questions, we share concerns and these friends are there to provide us with answers and they're happy to do so. They're much like our, 'in the same boat' friends, except they've had a chance to get back some sanity as their kids are older now. The mother from the 'said family' above served this role for a while after my first, but as time and distance came between us I've filled that space with other friends as well. Some family, some acquaintances, and sometimes even through a google search too! ;)
4. The I'll-Do-Anything-For-You Buddy
Oh, yes. This friend is priceless and one that I have a hard time accepting more often than not. I tend to be the type of person who doesn't like to ask for help, to bother people or put them out, and feel guilty when people do go out of their way for me. (with three little monsters on my hands you'd think I'd have that down) While I'm not good at receiving help from my 'do anything for you buddy' their attempts to be there certainly don't go unnoticed. I have friends who are there in each their own ways, whether donating to my latest cause, offering to help with a birthday party, to do whatever-whenever just to be there for me. Often times these friends are family, and when they're not they become family anyways.
5. The Slightly Glam Girlfriend
I'll be honest, most of my girlfriends are slightly glam. You know who you are... You love a good high heel, you know which makeup to point me towards, you have a small collection of bags and sunglasses, and you inspire me to put on a little lipstick when I'm going out to see you. These friends motivate me to keep it together and put a little spring in my step simply by their sheer glamour alone. Even though I know they'd love me just as much if I wore my uniform yoga pants and hoodie to dinner, it's always fun to pull out my jeans for these special girls! ;)
6. The Brutally Honest Pal
Yup, got me some of those too! These friends are necessary. I can tell them all my 'stuff' and know that they're going to give me the straight up, to the point, no beating around the bush, truth. Sometimes they'll tell us things we like, sometimes things we don't. But they're always going to tell us. I value these friends and everything they say because no matter what they're telling me, I know they're doing so with my best interest at heart. They're putting themselves in my shoes, they're seeing my perspective, they're playing devils advocate and they will always tell me if my outfit sucks or if it was my fault I'm fighting with Lucy. (No, I don't know any Lucy) The brutally honest pal will lay it on the line, but don't hold it against her - know that she's rooting for you!
What do you think about Parenting's six friends every mother needs? Do you have a different friend that fits into each? Can you think of any other 'must have' friends that every mother needs? If you're like me, you had several friends that squeezed into each category, and even some that fit into more than one! From what I can tell, having more than enough friends to go around just means I'm one of the lucky ones!
Clearly, some of my 'slightly glam' girlfriends!
See you tonight ladies!! xo